Roses are red,Violets are blue,
I copied your exam paper, And I failed too.

EXAMINER: Never mind what the date is, get on with the exam.
PUPIL: But, sir, I want to get something right.

TEACHER: Why do you always fail your exams?
PUPIL: Because I always get the wrong exam paper.

EXAM QUESTION: Where are the Andes?
PUPIL'S ANSWER: On the end of my armies.

EXAMINER: I told you not to look in your bag. You could have the answers.
PUPIL: I'm not, sir. I'm looking in Jim's bag. He's got the answers.

FATHER: How did you get on with your maths test today?
SON: I only got one sum wrong.
FATHER: Well done. How many sums were there?
SON: Twelve.
FATHER: So you got eleven right?
SON: No, they were the ones I couldn't do.

EXAM QUESTION: Where is Felixstowe?
PUPIL'S ANSWER: On the end of Felix's foot.

EXAM QUESTION: In Great Britain, where are kings and queens usually crowned?
PUPIL'S ANSWER: On the head.

EXAM QUESTION: What did James I do on coming to the throne?
PUPIL'S ANSWER: He sat on it.

EXAM QUESTION: What are the chief minerals to be found in Cornwall?
PUPIL'S ANSWER: Coca Cola and orangeade.